The past few days have been busy! Friday was my last full day working and I was bombarded all day by people who needed to check with me on "one last thing". And then I left my out of office audix on my phone and email and shut everything down. WOW!!! My co worker and I went to lunch and we both teared up because I felt like I was saying goodbye...even thought I know I will see her this week when I have Harper and am sure we will text and talk while I'm out. In that moment it just felt like I was saying good bye to my career. I'm sure I sound crazy but oh well. :) As I walked away from our lunch and headed home to finish my work day I couldn't stop smiling. Knowing that I had finally made it to this milestone and now I get to relax and enjoy all that is to come over the course of the next few days.
That afternoon The Colonel (my dad) and his wife flew in from Florida and Chad picked them up at the airport and dropped them off at their hotel so they could get settled and take a nap. Friday evening they came over along with three of my sisters for family dinner and we enjoyed many laughs and conversation. It's hard to believe that it's been nine years since The Colonel has been here and to add to that he's never been to our home or really anything that is part of our lives here. The boys were ecstatic to have him and showed them their room and play room and got their Nerf guns out. It was great! I made my spaghetti and homemade meatballs with a salad and garlic bread and everyone had a nice time getting acclimated to having them here.
Friday morning my dear friend Mich and her husband Craig welcomed their daughter L into the world. And she is precious! I was stalking my phone all morning waiting for pictures and updates. I am so excited that she is here and looking forward to spending the next few months with Mich loving on our daughters. The excitement of her birth turned to worry and concern as we received word Sat am that she was moved to the NICU due to low oxygen levels. By mid afternoon we received an update that they had moved her to the Children's hospital and there were problems with her heart. Chad and I spent allot of time in prayer together and separately yesterday praying for the doctors, little L, Mich and Craig. Because Mich had a C-section she is still at the hospital that L was born at and is hoping to be discharged today so she can go be with L. Craig continued to keep us updated as time allowed and he and Chad talked for an hour last night. As more details became available we are thankful that the doctors have identified the problem with her heart and are in prayer that they will know which of the three options will be needed for L to recover. Because she is so small it will take time to determine next steps and right now the doctors are waiting to see how her body responds to the meds she is on. My heart breaks for Mich and Craig as I can't imagine all of the feelings that are experiencing right now. Mich is heartbroken she can't be with L right this moment and I know she is trying to "keep it together" and be "strong" but I know it will hit her soon and it's so hard not being able to be right there for her. We know that God has L's life in His hands and find comfort in that and wait as each hour goes by to see what will happen next.
Today Carm flies in to be here for Harper's birth and spend the next nine days with our family. Carm is my "person". If you've ever watched the Grey's Anatomy episode where Christina and Meredith are talking and have the "your my person" conversation...it is the epitome of my relationship with Carm. She is one of the only people who I've known for more than half of my life. She has been there with me through all of life's major events since I was 15 and is that person that I call almost every morning at 8:30 just to say hi for five minutes and chat. As we've gotten older, married, and had children, our families have grown close and we spend time together every year. Her husband and Chad get a long great and our children are starting to cultivate friendships which we are excited to watch as they get older. Her children are my god babies and we've asked her and her husband Sean to be Harper's godparents. I can't imagine having anyone else here with Chad and I for her birth and can't wait to get her at the airport in a matter of hours! We plan on watching the movie pitch perfect tonight while enjoying some Lindt chocolate and hot chocolate. Chad is working tomorrow so Carm and I will enjoy coffee in the am followed by a Target run I'm sure, then we will meet up with The Colonel and Patty to pick the boys up at school and enjoy Kylan's basketball practice. And the morning after that I have Harper!!! :) Yep it's happening in just a matter of days. And with that being said I will leave you with a picture my sister took of me on Friday, because she said I didn't have enough of my pregnant. I'm not a huge fan of it but it does mark the almost end of my pregnancy so I thought I'd share. :) You can tell that I haven't had much sleep..lol
Well apparently there is something wrong with the link I use to upload pictures so I will have to come back and try again.
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Sunday, January 6, 2013
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Reflecting on 2012
I sat in front of my laptop last night and attempted to write a post titled 2012 in review...and I started it a couple of times and kept deleting it. So I decided to take a break and come back to it today. As I sit on my favorite couch with my cup of coffee in hand I continue to reflect on 2012 and the year that it was. 2012 was a year full of many things; amazing memories, new friendships, redemption, tears, trials, joy, life, and stillness. Our family started 2012 in Florida visiting my dad and his wife and taking the boys to their(and mine) first trip to Disney World. We invited my dad and his wife to join us and it was an amazing time together as a family. A trip that two years ago I would have told you would never happen in a million years. During 2011 God worked in the both the heart of my dad and I and we were able to start healing and reestablishing our relationship. By extension my children learned that I had a dad and were able to meet him and his wife and spend a considerable amount of time with them throughout 2012. Having him back in my life has been bittersweet on many levels but I face each day with joy knowing that he has an opportunity to create a meaningful relationship with his grandchildren and they get to know him.
In February I fell and broke my foot in four places and was home bound for nine long weeks. The irony of it all was that I had literally just purchased a pair of flats to wear to my sister's 21st birthday dinner and while walking out the door slipped on our garage stair went flying, heard a snap and fell. Come to find out there was a sticker on the bottom of one of shoes unbeknownst to me that had caused me to slip on the stair. In lieu of going to the hospital right away I had my husband grab my boot and crutches that were stored neatly downstairs from my previous break on the same foot less than a year prior...put them on, took some ibuprofen and headed to her birthday dinner. The next day the podiatrist confirmed that I had indeed broken my foot in four places and I was put on mandatory bed rest for nine weeks...Talk about rough and emotional! I am not one to be still often ie I love to run a thousand miles a minute and have a busy calendar and do lots of things with friends and family. Being home laid up for nine weeks was not on my agenda...however God knew that in order to get my attention I needed to be still....LITERALLY. :) It was during these nine weeks that he did great things in my life and that of my husband. We had some amazing conversations during my time at home, not that we don't on a day to day basis, but being home day in and day out gave us the extra time to really talk at length about a lot. It was during these talks that we prayed and made the decision that we wanted to expand our family. You see up until this point we had spent the better part of three years going back and forth on if we wanted to try and have another baby....until that moment we weren't sure if our marriage could handle another loss, if Chad was ready to take the risk of me being pregnant and something happening...if I was ready to take that leap of faith and try again. We were both afraid but at the core we both wanted another child. And it was during my time at home with a broken foot that God poured peace over our hearts and with anticipation, joy, and I'll be honest some fear we made the decision to try and expand our family. And it was in May before mother's day that we found out we were pregnant. This pregnancy has been full of challenges and trials but also one of pure joy! Being able to see our precious daughter on a 3D/4D ultrasound was priceless, hearing her heartbeat, and feeling her kick daily have been blessings. Now as we enter 2013 and anticipate her arrival I am excited for her to join our family and see what God has in store for us.
In addition to the many blessings that 2012 brought there were also many tears and trials. Relationships were tested and addiction showed its ugly face yet again impacting extended family members to the point of near death. It was trying at best and there were times when the tears did not stop for days. There were many unknowns and the domino effect it had on our family and my siblings was profound. It was during these trials that God reminded me how fragile relationships are even those that you thought were the strongest. He reminded me of the importance in putting my complete trust and faith in Him alone. It was a season of learning and heartache and entering 2013 those relationships are still strained but I know that God is using this challenge to stretch me and mold me.... I squirm at the discomfort, unfamiliarity, and walls that go flying up, but know that in my weakness HE is showing me His strength. It is my prayer that in my vulnerability God will bring healing and peace.
During 2012 God moved mountains in my career. Having spent the last three years commuting three hours a day, four times a week, God provided a way for my office to be moved back home and the need for me to be in Chicago changed. This change blessed our family in so many ways. The extra time at home in the evenings was profound and the stress that I often carried with rushing here and there and not being home enough went away. I was able to invest time in friendships that had changed over the past three years since my time home wasn't frequent. And the list of blessings continued. God brought two new friendships into my life that melt my heart for many reasons. It's been exciting to see all that HE has done and provided for our family and looking back in hindsight He was just waiting for the right time to teach me another lesson on patience.
As I enter 2013 I have many goals and aspirations for 2013. I'm not one to make new year's resolutions because I am one to reflect on what I would like to accomplish and set reasonable goals that are attainable. This year I am excited to be home with my daughter for three months and during that time make memories with all of our children and just love on them. I'm excited to get my body back so to speak and embrace clean eating once again and make fitness a priority. I also want to get plugged in to a Bible study this year and or a small group of women. I didn't take the opportunity to do so in 2012 and have greatly missed the fellowship that comes with doing so. Lastly, it is my prayer that I will continue to Choose Joy in all circumstances and that every day I will choose to share the joy of Christ and be encouraging and positive and not let the devil steal it.
While looking over my prayer journal from the year I scanned many of the verses that God used to speak to me and thought I would leave you with a few of them.. :
In February I fell and broke my foot in four places and was home bound for nine long weeks. The irony of it all was that I had literally just purchased a pair of flats to wear to my sister's 21st birthday dinner and while walking out the door slipped on our garage stair went flying, heard a snap and fell. Come to find out there was a sticker on the bottom of one of shoes unbeknownst to me that had caused me to slip on the stair. In lieu of going to the hospital right away I had my husband grab my boot and crutches that were stored neatly downstairs from my previous break on the same foot less than a year prior...put them on, took some ibuprofen and headed to her birthday dinner. The next day the podiatrist confirmed that I had indeed broken my foot in four places and I was put on mandatory bed rest for nine weeks...Talk about rough and emotional! I am not one to be still often ie I love to run a thousand miles a minute and have a busy calendar and do lots of things with friends and family. Being home laid up for nine weeks was not on my agenda...however God knew that in order to get my attention I needed to be still....LITERALLY. :) It was during these nine weeks that he did great things in my life and that of my husband. We had some amazing conversations during my time at home, not that we don't on a day to day basis, but being home day in and day out gave us the extra time to really talk at length about a lot. It was during these talks that we prayed and made the decision that we wanted to expand our family. You see up until this point we had spent the better part of three years going back and forth on if we wanted to try and have another baby....until that moment we weren't sure if our marriage could handle another loss, if Chad was ready to take the risk of me being pregnant and something happening...if I was ready to take that leap of faith and try again. We were both afraid but at the core we both wanted another child. And it was during my time at home with a broken foot that God poured peace over our hearts and with anticipation, joy, and I'll be honest some fear we made the decision to try and expand our family. And it was in May before mother's day that we found out we were pregnant. This pregnancy has been full of challenges and trials but also one of pure joy! Being able to see our precious daughter on a 3D/4D ultrasound was priceless, hearing her heartbeat, and feeling her kick daily have been blessings. Now as we enter 2013 and anticipate her arrival I am excited for her to join our family and see what God has in store for us.
In addition to the many blessings that 2012 brought there were also many tears and trials. Relationships were tested and addiction showed its ugly face yet again impacting extended family members to the point of near death. It was trying at best and there were times when the tears did not stop for days. There were many unknowns and the domino effect it had on our family and my siblings was profound. It was during these trials that God reminded me how fragile relationships are even those that you thought were the strongest. He reminded me of the importance in putting my complete trust and faith in Him alone. It was a season of learning and heartache and entering 2013 those relationships are still strained but I know that God is using this challenge to stretch me and mold me.... I squirm at the discomfort, unfamiliarity, and walls that go flying up, but know that in my weakness HE is showing me His strength. It is my prayer that in my vulnerability God will bring healing and peace.
During 2012 God moved mountains in my career. Having spent the last three years commuting three hours a day, four times a week, God provided a way for my office to be moved back home and the need for me to be in Chicago changed. This change blessed our family in so many ways. The extra time at home in the evenings was profound and the stress that I often carried with rushing here and there and not being home enough went away. I was able to invest time in friendships that had changed over the past three years since my time home wasn't frequent. And the list of blessings continued. God brought two new friendships into my life that melt my heart for many reasons. It's been exciting to see all that HE has done and provided for our family and looking back in hindsight He was just waiting for the right time to teach me another lesson on patience.
As I enter 2013 I have many goals and aspirations for 2013. I'm not one to make new year's resolutions because I am one to reflect on what I would like to accomplish and set reasonable goals that are attainable. This year I am excited to be home with my daughter for three months and during that time make memories with all of our children and just love on them. I'm excited to get my body back so to speak and embrace clean eating once again and make fitness a priority. I also want to get plugged in to a Bible study this year and or a small group of women. I didn't take the opportunity to do so in 2012 and have greatly missed the fellowship that comes with doing so. Lastly, it is my prayer that I will continue to Choose Joy in all circumstances and that every day I will choose to share the joy of Christ and be encouraging and positive and not let the devil steal it.
While looking over my prayer journal from the year I scanned many of the verses that God used to speak to me and thought I would leave you with a few of them.. :
- Whatever happens conduct yourself in a manner worthy of the gospel of Chris. Then whether I come and see you or only hear about in my absence, I will know that you stand firm in one spirit, contending as one man for the faith of the gospel. Philippians 1:27
- "In this world you will have trouble, but take heart. I have overcome the world" John 16:33
- Find rest, O my soul, in God alone. My hope comes from Him. Psalm 62:5
- If you have any encouragement from being united with Chris, if any comfort from His love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Philippians 2:1-2
- O Lord you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise, you perceive my thoughts from afar. you discern my going out and my lying down. you are familiar with all my way. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely O Lord. Psalm 139: 1-4
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Checking the boxes!
I love making lists! I know they can often be a double edge sword and I've worked harder and not being so hard on myself if my lists don't get completed within x time, BUT it really helps me stay focused on what I need to do for our family, work, projects, etc. At any given time I could have up to five lists going. What I like about it is that once I write my thoughts down on a list I can "let them go" and don't have to keep track of them in my head. For example...I've had a list for Harper for months...that list has included items needed for her room, baby necessities, art ideas, and baby websites that my girlfriends have given me for references. I often have a project list going of things around our home I'd like to work on....organize laundry room, put away boys summer clothes, go through Thomas the Train totes and give away to friends, organize Bible study notes...you get the idea. Well this weekend has been both relaxing and productive! Today I woke up and after enjoying my cup of coffee reviewed my lists and talked with Chad about what our plan for the days was going to be. We had a couple of Christmas items that we needed to return, gloves to get for Ky, and a few other misc items. We took off after breakfast and checked those boxes complete by noon. As we pulled in the driveway Chad had the boys jump in my car while he went and grabbed Harper's car seat so we could see how all three would fit in my car. Chad has a four door avalanche that has a TON of room in the back and all three fit very comfortably....but I have a Ford Fusion (that I love love) and we weren't sure if the car seat, plus Ky's booster, plus Noah would work or if it would be to tight of a squeeze. Which if they don't all fit well in my car it's not a big deal as we can just use Chad's truck while in town...my car is used for our commutes to and from Chicago and most of our driving but we don't put a lot of miles on either vehicle while in town since we can get from one side to the other in less than 15 minutes tops. That all being said her car seat and the boys fit just fine in my car. So her car seat is now locked in to my car and her stroller is in my truck neatly awaiting her arrival. Check and Check... :) Since we knew that we would be home the rest of the day we both started working on misc items that we wanted to do around the house. I detest going through mail especially junk mail but I am a freak when it comes to shredding everything. So I usually let my mail bin pile up and when it is ready to overflow I go through everything file it and shred. It's funny because every time that I do this I promise myself to do better and go through it multiple times during the week...does it ever happen? Nope...since I do everything online and have spreadsheets that I work off of I don't have a need to really touch the items that come in and I always check the mail every day and filter out the items that require attention or are from friends and family...SO today was the day and I sat with my lovely shredder and shredded my little heart out and filed and reorganized my coupon pouch.
While I was busy with that project Chad brought up three totes that we've had in our laundry/storage room for the past two years that are full of Thomas the Train and Geo Track Train sets. When the boys were toddlers they LOVED trains and their papa collects them and has a huge track that takes up a big part of his basement. Needless to say by the time they were two we had a large train table and trains galore. It was a worthwhile investment as the boys played with them for years and made so many memories with them. But they have since retired to our storage room for us to decide what to do with them. We have a large play room for the kids and it's always been my goal to keep a couple of totes of infant/toddler toys so that when my girlfriends come over with their babies of different ages I have something for them and when my sisters have kids I'll have items for them to play with. That being said now that we are having a little girl I know we don't need to keep everything the boys had. The neat thing is my sister's good friend has a 20 month old that loves trains and so we decided to separate the three totes into two big ones and give one to her and the other either to my girlfriend from Alaska, Dawn, or if she's not interested we will hold onto. After Chad loaded the truck with the large tote I took it over to L's house and her son was so precious!! As soon as her husband opened the tote he squealed and was talking non stop about them. I know they will get a lot of use and enjoyment and that melts my heart. It was so precious though because when Chad brought up the totes Kylan had a little melt down and didn't understand why were giving them away and said he wanted them to play with. It was a great opportunity for me to sit with both boys and talk to them about how God calls us to share with others and not to be selfish. We talked about blessing others and praying that God would lay opportunities on our hearts. Ky and Noah took it all in and nodded their heads..they Ky got up and started to help Chad organize things and talked about how the little boys would like them. I'm thankful for the opportunity God presented for me to talk with them about giving and hope as they grow older they will remember to give and use the gifts that God has blessed them with.
This week will be a busy one....with a work day tomorrow, then a day off, then three last days of work I anticipate the email will be busy and conference calls with be many but I'm excited that the end is in sight!! VERY EXCITED!!! We don't have any plans for NYE as our dear friends who we normally enjoy NYE with are having their baby girl on Friday...so it will be a welcomed pj night in and most likely I will crash by nine..I don't remember the last time I saw midnight....unless you count the times I get up due to insomnia..haha. Well I'm going to tuck the boys in and relax with the hubs for a bit. Blessings!
While I was busy with that project Chad brought up three totes that we've had in our laundry/storage room for the past two years that are full of Thomas the Train and Geo Track Train sets. When the boys were toddlers they LOVED trains and their papa collects them and has a huge track that takes up a big part of his basement. Needless to say by the time they were two we had a large train table and trains galore. It was a worthwhile investment as the boys played with them for years and made so many memories with them. But they have since retired to our storage room for us to decide what to do with them. We have a large play room for the kids and it's always been my goal to keep a couple of totes of infant/toddler toys so that when my girlfriends come over with their babies of different ages I have something for them and when my sisters have kids I'll have items for them to play with. That being said now that we are having a little girl I know we don't need to keep everything the boys had. The neat thing is my sister's good friend has a 20 month old that loves trains and so we decided to separate the three totes into two big ones and give one to her and the other either to my girlfriend from Alaska, Dawn, or if she's not interested we will hold onto. After Chad loaded the truck with the large tote I took it over to L's house and her son was so precious!! As soon as her husband opened the tote he squealed and was talking non stop about them. I know they will get a lot of use and enjoyment and that melts my heart. It was so precious though because when Chad brought up the totes Kylan had a little melt down and didn't understand why were giving them away and said he wanted them to play with. It was a great opportunity for me to sit with both boys and talk to them about how God calls us to share with others and not to be selfish. We talked about blessing others and praying that God would lay opportunities on our hearts. Ky and Noah took it all in and nodded their heads..they Ky got up and started to help Chad organize things and talked about how the little boys would like them. I'm thankful for the opportunity God presented for me to talk with them about giving and hope as they grow older they will remember to give and use the gifts that God has blessed them with.
This week will be a busy one....with a work day tomorrow, then a day off, then three last days of work I anticipate the email will be busy and conference calls with be many but I'm excited that the end is in sight!! VERY EXCITED!!! We don't have any plans for NYE as our dear friends who we normally enjoy NYE with are having their baby girl on Friday...so it will be a welcomed pj night in and most likely I will crash by nine..I don't remember the last time I saw midnight....unless you count the times I get up due to insomnia..haha. Well I'm going to tuck the boys in and relax with the hubs for a bit. Blessings!
Saturday, December 29, 2012
Christmas, single digits, relaxing
It's hard to believe that Christmas has come and gone! The month of December has flown by, but we took the opportunity to enjoy every minute of it!A normal Christmas for us is traveling to Chicago to have our Chicago Christmas which is usually a week or two before Christmas with our family there. We also rotate spending Christmas afternoon with either my family or my in laws and then whose ever off year it is we spend Christmas Eve with or the weekend before or after...whatever is easiest. Because I'm nine months pregnant and due any day now we opted not to travel to Chicago or anywhere that was more than 20 minutes away. I am so nervous about my water breaking on it's own (even though it probably won't) and being far from the hospital. The great thing is that my family from Chicago came up the Saturday before Christmas to celebrate and my sister hosted. It was fantastic and so nice not to have to cook or clean. :) We had a wonderful time catching up and laughing a lot. Sunday we celebrated Christmas with Chad's family which went well...we went over there around ten and the boys and I went in pjs which I loved. Christmas Eve we planned on going to church but I was pretty uncomfortable so we decided to stay home. I was bummed because we are usually at a family's members home on Christmas Eve and aren't able to go to Christmas Eve service but I'm glad we stayed home and just relaxed as a family. We enjoyed a quiet night in our media room watching Charlie Brown Christmas and Noah wrote a letter to Santa which was precious.
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| The boys' tree in their room |
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| I love having the Christmas tree up! |
Speaking of as I looked at my counter today I realized we have approached the single digits until Harper is here. It's hard to believe I only have four days left of work, my dad and his wife fly in on Friday and my best friend Carm flys in on Sunday. As I looked at my work planner this week I realized I needed to block my calendar off for the next few months and that I really only have four working days left!!! I'm so excited and blessed to have made it this far in my pregnancy and know God's hand has been over this whole experience. I have to be honest and share that this past week was a rather rough one for me because my heart was very anxious again and I feel rather emotional just waiting for her to come. I think it's because memories are flooding back and I just want her here and to know she is healthy and ok. It was "perfect timing" because Thursday night I decided to pick up the book Unglued that I've been reading (by Lysa Terkerust) and just happened to start where I left of and the whole section talked about being anxious and joyful and I knew that God was speaking to my heart once again.
Today has been full of relaxing! I woke up early and was determined to complete my last menu before Harper comes and headed out to the grocery store to do my big two week run. And I'm happy to say it was a success..my water did NOT break in aisle five (one of my fears) and I made it home just in time for Chad to unload his truck while I organized the pantry and started to put things away. After breakfast Chad went and picked up the boys and took them sledding with his sister. I'm really glad they were able to get some energy out and spend time outside! I invited one of my students who I used to teach in youth group over for coffee....yep I taught her when she was in 6th grade and she is now a sophomore in high school!! I feel a little old....but love that I can still be involved in her life and catch up with her while she is home. After she left I took a nap and spent a better part of the afternoon cuddled up on the couch with my favorite sweatshirt blanket reading the rest of Unglued and enjoying being still. I'm praying that over the next week I am able to finish my to do list both for home and work but also balance quiet time and soak up these last few days of being pregnant with Harper before she is here. I am overwhelmed and thankful that God is blessing us with her and can't wait to hold her in my arms.
Thursday, December 20, 2012
18 days, snowfall, and rest
This month has flown by! I can't believe Christmas is literally around the corner and right after that is Harper's birthday! It truly feels like yesterday when I took four pregnancy tests at 4am ran to the store bought more and cornered Chad by the kitchen door to share our joyful news! How the time has flown! Even more so how many lessons God has taught us along this season in our lives. I'm in awe of God's faithfulness, his patience, and love He has for our daughter and us. It's humbling and life changing. I knew going into this pregnancy that it would probably be hard since the last thing I have to compare it too is Mason. And I was right it has been and at times it's been harder than I ever dreamed, but folded into these eight months have been many moments of happy tears, pure joy, love, renewed strength, and awe. Awe at a God who has given Chad and I a precious daughter to love and parent. I am so thankful that we have another opportunity to parent and add to our family that is growing! We are thrilled. And as she has grown in my belly I've enjoyed sitting at home feeling her kick, turn, poke, and hiccup. It's been one of my favorite parts of this whole experience. Last weekend we finished her nursery. I color coded her clothes, separated them by size and placed them in her dresser. And sat there and thumbed through each drawer just thinking about dressing her in them and the memories that are about to happen. A season that is about to start and life that is just beginning, a family that will be forever changed.
I would be lying if I said I wasn't anxious at times. Especially the last two weeks....there have been moments where I've had to catch my breath and pray and ask God for peace and grace to get through the day. As I look at my countdown app every day and the numbers get smaller I found/find myself anxious to meet her, to count her toes, hear her cry, and hold her in my arms. It's getting so close but at times it seems to very far away! I've chosen those moments to grab tight to scripture and repeat it over and over and that's helped alot. Eighteen days ago I was enjoying Christmas decor in our home, Christmas shopping, coffee time with girlfriends and 18 days from now (if not sooner) our daughter will be here. It's amazing. And I can't wait to meet her.
Yesterday while looking at the weather I saw that we were due for a blizzard and decided to work later than usual and wrap up as much at the office as I could and pack up for Christmas. I'm so glad I did! This morning we had snow, then rain, then blizzard winds and more snow. And from the comfort of our home I watched as we were enveloped in white snow. We decided to keep the boys home from school today as I was nervous about the roads and by mid afternoon was glad that we did. I love watching the snow fall and even looking out at the snow covered trees and horizon...I'm not such a big fan of shoveling or driving in it but luckily I don't have to shovel and am content staying put the next day or so. Resting is not something that I do well or often because I love to go go go! I love to check off lists, enjoy coffee with friends, or explore new things with the boys and Chad. But lately I have relished in just resting and am taking full advantage of it. Normally we do a lot of traveling around Christmas but this year we are staying close to home for obvious reasons and it's been great. I've enjoyed naps on the weekend, reading magazines, and finishing up my check lists. :) I know sooner than later my days of resting will change to days of diapers, nursing, and loving on Harper. And I can't wait!
Tomorrow I turn 31 which I will be honest..I'm starting to feel old but I'm thankful for another year of life and all that my year of 30 brought. My plan for tomorrow is to make one of my favorite meals, watch a Christmas movie with the fam and enjoy some hot chocolate and cuddling with the hubs. He was so precious and wanted to take me out somewhere, but I'll be honest and share that staying home and enjoying a home cooked meal around our table sounds just perfect this year.
I would be lying if I said I wasn't anxious at times. Especially the last two weeks....there have been moments where I've had to catch my breath and pray and ask God for peace and grace to get through the day. As I look at my countdown app every day and the numbers get smaller I found/find myself anxious to meet her, to count her toes, hear her cry, and hold her in my arms. It's getting so close but at times it seems to very far away! I've chosen those moments to grab tight to scripture and repeat it over and over and that's helped alot. Eighteen days ago I was enjoying Christmas decor in our home, Christmas shopping, coffee time with girlfriends and 18 days from now (if not sooner) our daughter will be here. It's amazing. And I can't wait to meet her.
Yesterday while looking at the weather I saw that we were due for a blizzard and decided to work later than usual and wrap up as much at the office as I could and pack up for Christmas. I'm so glad I did! This morning we had snow, then rain, then blizzard winds and more snow. And from the comfort of our home I watched as we were enveloped in white snow. We decided to keep the boys home from school today as I was nervous about the roads and by mid afternoon was glad that we did. I love watching the snow fall and even looking out at the snow covered trees and horizon...I'm not such a big fan of shoveling or driving in it but luckily I don't have to shovel and am content staying put the next day or so. Resting is not something that I do well or often because I love to go go go! I love to check off lists, enjoy coffee with friends, or explore new things with the boys and Chad. But lately I have relished in just resting and am taking full advantage of it. Normally we do a lot of traveling around Christmas but this year we are staying close to home for obvious reasons and it's been great. I've enjoyed naps on the weekend, reading magazines, and finishing up my check lists. :) I know sooner than later my days of resting will change to days of diapers, nursing, and loving on Harper. And I can't wait!
Tomorrow I turn 31 which I will be honest..I'm starting to feel old but I'm thankful for another year of life and all that my year of 30 brought. My plan for tomorrow is to make one of my favorite meals, watch a Christmas movie with the fam and enjoy some hot chocolate and cuddling with the hubs. He was so precious and wanted to take me out somewhere, but I'll be honest and share that staying home and enjoying a home cooked meal around our table sounds just perfect this year.
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Impromtu dinners & Philippians 4:6
Yesterday was a fun filled day! It started off early with Ky's basketball game. Ash and Kris came to watch him as did Kallio and the rest of our fam. We had a lot of great laughs watching these little kids play. One of the boys from the opposing team made a basket at the very end of a quarter and jumped up into another players arms and was high fiving each other and their team came flying off the bench to congratulate him. You would have thought they won the NBA finals. It was precious. After the game we headed over to the club to watch Noah's tennis lessons and Ash and Kris followed and Nena joined us shortly as well. They had a blast watching Noah and Noah enjoyed the extra attention. Afterwards we all headed over to BW3's for lunch and enjoyed some boneless wings, more laughs, and a few tears by Ky. Nena gave each of the boys three dollars to try and win a toy from one of those games that you have to pull the toy with the metal arms. Noah won a Green Bay Packer teddy bear and Ky came back empty handed and was a mess. We talked through it with him but it took him a while to regain his composure. It was wonderful to enjoy lunch with family!
After lunch we headed home and while the boys were getting cleaned up the electrician stopped by to look at Harper's room. We want to install a ceiling fan with a dimmer in her room but neither Chad nor I know the first thing on what needs to be done. Luckily the electrician we know is great and he walked us through the supplies we need to purchase and he is going to come back on Friday and take care of it for us!! Yeah one more things almost off my list. Chad and I need to run to both stores today and compare the two fans we have it narrowed down to and pick one. Have I mentioned that we've looked at fans probably 6 times already.. :)
When the boys were done getting cleaned up Chad took them over to his parents to frost cookies. It's something they do with them every year and always have a blast. I headed over to the spa for a massage and enjoyed it. I normally get a massage once a month to help work out the stress in my shoulders and neck as that is where it goes, however I stopped getting them month two into my pregnancy. Since things have been going better and I'm far enough along I decided to give one a try. I will tell you that in the beginning it was a little awkward using the prego pillow and headrest that went with it and I was hot in a matter of minutes because they had the heater on the table and blankets and yeah I think I was like 115 degrees lol. Luckily my massage therapist is awesome and we got rid of the prego pillow and I moved to my side and cooled off a ton! The hour went by so fast though but in the end was enjoyable. We planned on going to church last night and were going to pick up the boys on our way, but Mich called shortly after I left the spa and invited us over for an impromptu dinner. Mich is pregnant with a little girl and will have her four days before I have Harper. We are so excited to be on leave together and experience this next season in tandem with one another! That being said Chad and I knew this would probably be our last chance to have family time with them before the babies come since we move into Christmas mode next week. While I was disappointed at missing church I knew we would make some great memories with Mich, Craig, and C and we did. We ordered this amazing new pizza that was to die for!!! Mich and I split a pizza..her half was jalapeno popper and mine was mac and cheese. We ordered cheese for the kids and a meat for the guys. It totally hit the spot! The boys played together so well! They wasted no time in going downstairs and using their imaginations for hours! We adults enjoyed our time upstairs catching up and listening to the boys giggle and run around.. it was great! Mich and I spent time in L's nursery looking at things and then in her office as I've become her unofficial decorator. ;) We then scoped out etsy and a few other sights looking for a few pieces to fill in some gaps. And before we knew it the time was 9:30 and our kids were WAY past their bedtime. But it was so worth it and just a fantastic night!!
The boys crashed as soon as we got home and I of course was wide awake. Chad is always on call with his job and even though he was secondary this week his phone started ringing at 11:00 pm. Double Ugh! I had a hard time falling asleep and woke up a ton..not that there is anything new or surprising about that. But then around 2 when I woke up I started to get anxious. Harper has been quieter than usual and I started to concentrate on her movements and when there weren't a ton I got up and grabbed some orange juice and started to move around hoping to initiate anything. And she did kick and move around but I can tell that my heart is anxious and if I'm being honest a little scared. When I think about how close we are to having her I'm beyond excited but there is a small part of me that is anxious and scared that something bad is going to happen and I want her here so I know she's ok. So then I looked up this verse in scripture and prayed over it for quite some time:
Philippians 4:6 (NIV)
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
I'm thankful that I can take my worries before the cross and leave them there.
After a relaxing morning in pjs I'm trying to decide what I want to work on and what I don't. Luckily we don't have to be anywhere today and can just chill at home as a family!
After lunch we headed home and while the boys were getting cleaned up the electrician stopped by to look at Harper's room. We want to install a ceiling fan with a dimmer in her room but neither Chad nor I know the first thing on what needs to be done. Luckily the electrician we know is great and he walked us through the supplies we need to purchase and he is going to come back on Friday and take care of it for us!! Yeah one more things almost off my list. Chad and I need to run to both stores today and compare the two fans we have it narrowed down to and pick one. Have I mentioned that we've looked at fans probably 6 times already.. :)
When the boys were done getting cleaned up Chad took them over to his parents to frost cookies. It's something they do with them every year and always have a blast. I headed over to the spa for a massage and enjoyed it. I normally get a massage once a month to help work out the stress in my shoulders and neck as that is where it goes, however I stopped getting them month two into my pregnancy. Since things have been going better and I'm far enough along I decided to give one a try. I will tell you that in the beginning it was a little awkward using the prego pillow and headrest that went with it and I was hot in a matter of minutes because they had the heater on the table and blankets and yeah I think I was like 115 degrees lol. Luckily my massage therapist is awesome and we got rid of the prego pillow and I moved to my side and cooled off a ton! The hour went by so fast though but in the end was enjoyable. We planned on going to church last night and were going to pick up the boys on our way, but Mich called shortly after I left the spa and invited us over for an impromptu dinner. Mich is pregnant with a little girl and will have her four days before I have Harper. We are so excited to be on leave together and experience this next season in tandem with one another! That being said Chad and I knew this would probably be our last chance to have family time with them before the babies come since we move into Christmas mode next week. While I was disappointed at missing church I knew we would make some great memories with Mich, Craig, and C and we did. We ordered this amazing new pizza that was to die for!!! Mich and I split a pizza..her half was jalapeno popper and mine was mac and cheese. We ordered cheese for the kids and a meat for the guys. It totally hit the spot! The boys played together so well! They wasted no time in going downstairs and using their imaginations for hours! We adults enjoyed our time upstairs catching up and listening to the boys giggle and run around.. it was great! Mich and I spent time in L's nursery looking at things and then in her office as I've become her unofficial decorator. ;) We then scoped out etsy and a few other sights looking for a few pieces to fill in some gaps. And before we knew it the time was 9:30 and our kids were WAY past their bedtime. But it was so worth it and just a fantastic night!!
The boys crashed as soon as we got home and I of course was wide awake. Chad is always on call with his job and even though he was secondary this week his phone started ringing at 11:00 pm. Double Ugh! I had a hard time falling asleep and woke up a ton..not that there is anything new or surprising about that. But then around 2 when I woke up I started to get anxious. Harper has been quieter than usual and I started to concentrate on her movements and when there weren't a ton I got up and grabbed some orange juice and started to move around hoping to initiate anything. And she did kick and move around but I can tell that my heart is anxious and if I'm being honest a little scared. When I think about how close we are to having her I'm beyond excited but there is a small part of me that is anxious and scared that something bad is going to happen and I want her here so I know she's ok. So then I looked up this verse in scripture and prayed over it for quite some time:
Philippians 4:6 (NIV)
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
I'm thankful that I can take my worries before the cross and leave them there.
After a relaxing morning in pjs I'm trying to decide what I want to work on and what I don't. Luckily we don't have to be anywhere today and can just chill at home as a family!
Saturday, December 8, 2012
Insomnia
I have to say that this pregnancy has been full of many sleepless nights including this one. And to be honest they don't bother me a whole lot because I've had insomnia for years, however I feel like it's only gotten worse over the last 8.5 months. I think part of it is that I can't get my brain to shut off and or when I get up to go to the bathroom (which seems to be almost every hour these days) I start thinking again about things I want to do, or Harper, or her room, or the boys, or 1000 other things. And my routine is usually the same. I lay there and turn side to side and pray that I will fall back asleep and when I can't I grab my phone or one of Chad's if mine is dead and read hoping that will make me tired. And if that doesn't work then I get up and start walking around and doing something. Sometimes it's changing laundry, or dishes, or cleaning out closets. Tonight it was walking into Harper's room and looking at her bookshelf that just came yesterday and picking up her diaper bag and other new items and just looking at them. I can't believe she will be here in on a few weeks. The time has flown by so fast and now I sit with anticipation of holding her, counting her fingers and toes, looking at her tiny face, and just loving on her. I can't wait. I told Chad that I know I won't mind the sleepless nights to come because I will have her to keep me company and will cherish every moment awake with her. I think that I'll even sleep better once she's here...but I'll keep you posted on that one. For now I'm going to catch up on some blog reading and hopefully head back to bed. Tomorrow is another busy but fun day!
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