" I am the Lord. I change not." Malachi 3:6

Thursday, December 20, 2012

18 days, snowfall, and rest

This month has flown by! I can't believe Christmas is literally around the corner and right after that is Harper's birthday! It truly feels like yesterday when I took four pregnancy tests at 4am ran to the store bought more and cornered Chad by the kitchen door to share our joyful news! How the time has flown! Even more so how many lessons God has taught us along this season in our lives.  I'm in awe of God's faithfulness, his patience, and love He has for our daughter and us. It's humbling and life changing.  I knew going into this pregnancy that it would probably be hard since the last thing I have to compare it too is Mason.  And I was right it has been and at times it's been harder than I ever dreamed, but folded into these eight months have been many moments of happy tears, pure joy, love, renewed strength, and awe. Awe at a God who has given Chad and I a precious daughter to love and parent. I am so thankful that we have another opportunity to parent and add to our family that is growing! We are thrilled. And as she has grown in my belly I've enjoyed sitting at home feeling her kick, turn, poke, and hiccup. It's been one of my favorite parts of this whole experience. Last weekend we finished her nursery. I color coded her clothes, separated them by size and placed them in her dresser.  And sat there and thumbed through each drawer just thinking about dressing her in them and the memories that are about to happen. A season that is about to start and life that is just beginning, a family that will be forever changed.

I would be lying if I said I wasn't anxious at times. Especially the last two weeks....there have been moments where I've had to catch my breath and pray and ask God for peace and grace to get through the day. As I look at my countdown app every day and the numbers get smaller I found/find myself anxious to meet her, to count her toes, hear her cry, and hold her in my arms. It's getting so close but at times it seems to very far away! I've chosen those moments to grab tight to scripture and repeat it over and over and that's helped alot.  Eighteen days ago I was enjoying Christmas decor in our home, Christmas shopping, coffee time with girlfriends and 18 days from now (if not sooner) our daughter will be here. It's amazing.  And I can't wait to meet her.

Yesterday while looking at the weather I saw that we were due for a blizzard and decided to work later than usual and wrap up as much at the office as I could and pack up for Christmas. I'm so glad I did! This morning we had snow, then rain, then blizzard winds and more snow. And from the comfort of our home I watched as we were enveloped in white snow. We decided to keep the boys home from school today as I was nervous about the roads and by mid afternoon was glad that we did.  I love watching the snow fall and even looking out at the snow covered trees and horizon...I'm not such a big fan of shoveling or driving in it but luckily I don't have to shovel and am content staying put the next day or so. Resting is not something that I do well or often because I love to go go go! I love to check off lists, enjoy coffee with friends, or explore new things with the boys and Chad. But lately I have relished in just resting and am taking full advantage of it. Normally we do a lot of traveling around Christmas but this year we are staying close to home for obvious reasons and it's been great. I've enjoyed naps on the weekend, reading magazines, and finishing up my check lists. :)  I know sooner than later my days of resting will change to days of diapers, nursing, and loving on Harper. And I can't wait!

Tomorrow I turn 31 which I will be honest..I'm starting to feel old but I'm thankful for another year of life and all that my year of 30 brought. My plan for tomorrow is to make one of my favorite meals, watch a Christmas movie with the fam and enjoy some hot chocolate and cuddling with the hubs. He was so precious and wanted to take me out somewhere, but I'll be honest and share that staying home and enjoying a home cooked meal around our table sounds just perfect this year.

1 comment:

A Tiny Hiney said...

Happy birthday!!! Hope you can catch some rest in these last few days before Harper!!! Hugs!!!