" I am the Lord. I change not." Malachi 3:6

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Can't sleep

For the past three days I have woken up out of a dead sleep at 2am....and have felt the need to just pray...and so I have. I've tried to go back to sleep each night and just can't..tonight has been no exception. I switched the laundry over, will probaly head to the kitchen shortly, and plan on going for an early jog at 4am :) But my heart is praying and seeking God's direction and waiting. I've never felt so confident of where I am in life but also feel like He is talking to me to do more and He has my full attention. A few weeks ago I mentioned I had a great idea laid on my heart by the Holy Spirit and I've continued to pray for the past few weeks for confirmation and without a doubt I know this is what he wants me to do for Him at the moment. I've been taking quilting classes since Feb. and am loving it but more than that I've had a desire to use that hobby to serve Him. Haiti has long been on my heart as our church works closely with two orphanages in Haiti and has built a hospital, and sends groups there every couple of months. My sister, her fiance, and several of our friends left Haiti the day the big quake hit last year. Since then God has laid the people of Haiti on my heart Heavily! I'm going to make a quilt and sell it....taking all of money and donating it to our mission fund for Haiti. I've thought of making quilts for the orphans we support but they are living in tents right now and I think I could make more money for them by making a quilt and auctioning it off...what do you think? I've never done this before so i'm not sure if I should sell it on ebay...by word of mouth, make a button for my blog, but regardless i'm going to start sewing and get this quilt made. I know He will take care of the details as the quilt is completed. As my morning begins i'm thankful for His patience with me, for his Grace, and for the cross. More and more I've been reminded this week of whose in control and I can tell you right now it's not me. I was driving home last night and heard this.. "i'm not in control, He is,and His wisdom far surpases mine, and because of that I will put my full trust in Him. And I knew I was meant to hear that because I have been struggling with my fear of flying ever since I drove back from SC. I have to fly back the first week in June and then to Kansas City the following week and i've been dreading it...because of course I won't be in control and someone else will be. But then I heard the above blurp on K-Love and God gently reminded me that He can handle my insecurities.

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